Choose your words carefully...

Story Text:

Yesterday, i steered a thread back on topic, to avoid gettting into a discussion i wanted to have at a later date for various (what i feel) good reasons...

I pm'd the guy to explain why i'd put a 'back on topic' note in the thread and it would appear that i didn't choose my words carefully enough. Frankly, i didnt think it was even the smallest deal.

This morning i wake up to find that all of a sudden i've become the black prince of darkness, and am "a fucking dickhead".

I am a fucking dickhead on occasion, but i really try not to be, honest guv.. What upsets me is that whilst i've clearly upset a good friend, quite unintentionally, people automatically assume the absolute worst and go off on one without bothering to email or pm me about it.

When i fuck up, i like to be given the chance to straighten things out, i guess everyone does. I would have liked to have had the chance to clarify, and apologise if i'd worded myself badly or given the wrong impression.


To the person that i upset, im truly very sorry. It was not my intention to be a prat, and i should have worded my pm to you much better. I really didn't think it would cause even the slightest of issues, I apologise for the fact that it did.

If anyone ever has a problem..

I don't always get it right, im only human and make mistakes just like everyone else. If anyone at TW ever feels that i'm being a prat, or that i've upset them in anyway, or has any other grievance whatsoever, please tell me about it!

I can't put things right if im not aware that they're wrong, so please pm me, email me or IM me if you ever feel their is a problem.

My apologies again...



Well, that is what this thread is about according to Adsense. ;-)


For me it's currently "Literacy Cambodia - Help Educate Children. Learn More & Plan Your Trip of a Lifetime" - so, 'nuff said or wot? :-)


"Canadian wilderness" now.

Seems to be stressing your wild and uncontrolled side, Nick Hyde.

See? Google knows ;-) And now we all do.


Where is the thread, Nick? I like a good read ;)

I win the adsense relevancy contest;

I'm seeing "Tope Ranked in Efficiency: since 1948, providing humanitarian aid to people in need worldwide"

Nick I reckon everyone online has upset someone else at some point and equally everyone has been the offended one. I know this might be a special circumstance but I hope you don't feel you have to apologise every time you upset someone. (otherwise that prince of darkness tag won't stick)


Gurtie, you seem to have triggered " for girls..." now.

Hehe, this is the best AdWatch thread so far. Less obvious than the ones before.

That aside: Nick clearly stated that he's ruthless when it comes to quality or things expected to turn sour.

I must say I don't always get it when a mod - including Nick - PMs me. But it only takes an open mind and a limited toe length to ask politely for a clarification.

I presume this particular issue was a combination of unintended bluntness and unexpected bad mood. It happens ;-)

Sounds like...

"This morning i wake up to find that all of a sudden i've become the black prince of darkness, and am "a fucking dickhead".

Never a nice thing to have happen - kinda sounds like what happened to Matt with the whole WP fiaso...

Wouldn't be a good moderator if... weren't called a "a fucking dickhead" once in awhile.


All true, this was a particularly sensitive one though. Im lucky in hardly having to do a thing other than redo titles for the homepage and delete a little driveby spam or a bit of self promo now and again..

This one was different though, and it leaked over into a private forum im a member of and all hell broke loose over what for all appearances, would be a simple misunderstanding on one or two fronts.

I dont really feel the need to apologise everytime i upset someone, we'd have a 50/50 ratio to normal threads if that were the case :) but this one was special....

I am confused...

..before I started reading TW, "fucking dickhead" was a term that I never came across.

Since reading TW, it seems to appear every day. Without consulting my copy of "SEO for Dummies" (bad mistake that) I assumed that it was a term of endearment used by professionals for other professionals, to show you were "one of the lads"

Indeed I could have sworn I had seen everyone referred to by this hallowed term from orthodox billionaires like Gates and Page to the unorthodox (probably billionaires too) provisional wing of the spamming movement.

I have taken to using the term, under a number of nom de guerres, in forums all over the web, and have been surprised by the hostility it has aroused.

Perhaps I had better stop using it now before I upset anyone.

ROFL Cornwall

Perhaps I had better stop using it now before I upset anyone.

LOL...kinda like people who use the Thesaurus wrong.


We wouldnt be human if we all didnt upset people, get called dickheads, or be dickheads every now and then. It's so easy to do via forums, pms, emails or txt. Keeps life interesting, eh? :O)

well, whatever

It could have been worse.

For the recipient of the PM, I mean.

It was not as if the post had been summarily deleted, or having posting privileges yanked because of the capital offence of "using short lines to gain more screen time". Being the offender on that one, at another site of course, I had thought I was helping readers by formatting the line width to about 40 characters. The offence was nowhere to be found in their oft quoted TOS. The site owner was coy to the point of not mentioning the actual offence until I stumbled on his ramblings in their site management forum on the subject and brought it up myself. Stating my reason for doing it was not sufficient. He felt it necessary to extract a committment not to do it again. Again, he left it to me to puzzle out what the price was to have posting privileges reinstated.

The cost to the site is that I avoid posting even on subjects where few answers are forthcoming and I happen to have the answer.

The gain to me is amounts to a good chunk of time I can read elsewhere.

Like joining the exiles here :)


"Can't we all just get along?"


Anyone care to explain what this is all about? Either post details or don't talk about it.

Two Pence worth..

In most cases moderation sucks, whether you are giving or receiving.

Tell a strong personality to shut it, and they are likely to give it bollocks.

I guess its a style thing, if you are gonna moderate people then you'd better have good reason, and be prepared to put in the effort to explain why, especially if you value their inputs and want more at some point. If you don't, then well, you deserve all that gets chucked back at ya.

Do's and Dont's for General Discussion

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ahh fuck it, threadwatch rules :)

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